wolf of wall street pick up lines

What a fucking burden, and actually had to do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day? It's like a non-alcoholic beer. "Fuck this, shit that. And when it gets in, I'll give you a call and you come pick it up. Jordan Belfort: I put the money on that fucking table, not you! How are you doing today? I mean that was the last time we ever have sex. Its never landed. Yeah, I'm sure. I got news for you. That was so fucking great. You're a father now. Keep talking, you fucking piece of shit! This Martin Scorsese hit film stars Leonardo Dicaprio, Jonah Hill and Margot Robbie in lead roles. Donnie Azoff: Yeah? Donnie! Okay, great. I take Quaaludes 10-15 times a day for my back pain, Adderall to stay focused, Xanax to take the edge off, pot to mellow me out, cocaine to wake me back up again, and morphine Well, because its awesome. Jordan Belfort, There are two keys to success in the broker business; first of all you gotta stay relaxed, secondly you gotta always get stay high. Mark Hanna, Fugayzi, fugazi. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Nicky Koskoff: Perfect Hildy Azoff: Donnie Azoff: With their beautiful wife by their side, whos got big voluptuous tits. Look at yourself! Get away from the window! [gets a wire] In fact, back in the good old days, when getting blasted over lunch was considered normal corporate behavior, the IRS referred to these types of expenses as three-martini lunches! Despite focusing on multimillionaire stockbroker Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio . Something about laundering drug money through offshore boat racing and a guy named Rocky Aoki, you know the founder of Benihanna. Donnie Azoff: And I hate fucking chess!, And my wifewell, I guess shed earned her scene with me, but still; did she really have that much reason to be angry? I have some really, really great news. Expensive champagne and the what, we had to buy champagne. [narrating to the camera] They're gonna need to send in the National Guard to take me out, cos I ain't going nowhere! Last month you were a wine connoisseur, and now youre an aspiring landscape architect, Isnt that right? Jordan Belfort, You got my money taped to your tits, honey. Jordan Belfort: I love it. You gotta stay relaxed. Go on. That's that's okay, that doesn't matter. Do you really think that I don't know what you're up to? Jordan Belfort: Let the consequences of failure become so dire and so unthinkable that youll have no choice but to do whatever it takes to succeed., The easiest way to make money is -create something of such value that everybody wants and go out and give and create value, the money comes automatically., I've got the guts to die. Cinemark She's the best. No, no, this can be explained. People tend to give up. Chester Ming: If you agree to the divorce right now, I will allow visitation. lastly it's down to the humour. Hello, John. Good. Explains you. Wow. Pick up the phone and start dialing! You know? In fact, she's decided to throw them all away. I mean like, you married your cousin or some stupid shit. Alden Kupferberg: Oh baby. Now, right now, John, the stock trades over-the-counter at 10 cents a share. Do I jerk off? It had nothing to fucking do with me! It's got no no alcohol. And once you do fall in lovethat obsessive sort of love, that all-consuming love, where two people cant stand to be apart from each other for even a momenthow are you supposed to let a love like that pass you by? Jordan Belfort. Donnie Azoff: They're wrapped in sheets. It's not like that. God damn it! Is she like a first cousin, or is she Donnie Azoff: Jordan Belfort: Its because you have not learnt enough. Exactly. Jordan Belfort: Don't worry about it, I got it. Once we sucker them in, we unload the dog shit. I couldn't believe how these guys talked to each other! [pushes him away with her legs] Because sometime in the not-so-distant future, you're gonna be pulling up at a red light, in your beat-up old fucking Pinto, and that person's gonna be pulling up right alongside you in their brand new Porsche. Rugrat gets busted down in Miami, and guess who happens to be with him? Because sometime in the not-so-distant future, youre gonna be pulling up at a red light, in your beat-up old fucking Pinto, and that persons gonna be pulling up right alongside you in their brand new Porsche. This is America. Stratton Broker in a Bowtie: Is your landlord ready to evict you? Are you fucking serious? Mark Hanna: We want to hear what you have to say but need to verify your email. OK. It's the first time a stock is offered for sale to the general population. She even hired a gay butler. You cleaning your fishbowl? You had to deal with the Golf Course people too! They won't be able to see your review if you only submit your rating. Is it Wednesday already? Married people can't have friends? Theyre not buying shit. Alden Kupferberg, Who? Patrick Denham: Some disgusting wildebeest with three days of razor-stubble, in a sleeveless muumuu, crammed in next to you in a carload full of groceries from the fucking Price Club. You're not taking my kids, sweetheart. Look! Jordan Belfort: Mark Hanna: Take your little bowtie Get your shit, and get the fuck out of my office. Donnie and I were investing in a condominium complex in Venice. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: [pauses] I can get you beer if you want fuckin' beer. Good! Jordan Belfort: They're not buying shit. The jet skis just went overboard! [flashes to Jordan having sex with Naomi] Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan Belfort: Wakes up on plane; finds he is restrained by a seatbelt across his chest, picks up the phone, then calmly, in a transatlantic accent, Sees a young broker cleaning his fishbowl, Pretends to walk away, but suddenly turns back, Dangles the fish from the bowl by its tail and swallows it. Donnie Azoff: Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan Belfort: Do it differently each time. The whole Donnie Azoff: Pick up the phone and start dialing! When you get really good at it, youll fucking be stroking and youll be thinking about money. Mark Hanna, Her father is the brother of my mom. I just came. Leah Belfort: Naomi Lapaglia: I dont care whose birthday it is. Donnie Azoff, Its business. Jordan Belfort: Donnie. No, you didn't research the whole thing and deal with the fucking golf course people! It's like lasers. What a fucking burden, and actually had to do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day? I fucked up so bad. About a month later, Donnie and I decided to double team her on a Saturday afternoon while our wives were out shopping for Christmas presents. You understand? You're never gonna see the kids again! Jordan Belfort: You don't love me anymore, huh? Jordan, it's fucking good, right? Donnie Azoff: Yeah. Mark Hanna: Right! Yeah. Money. Not to mention countless dollars. [dubious] Oh, I'm good with water for now. Baby, you know you got real anger issues. What do you mean you want a divorce? Oh, my God! Look at this! No way, baby, no! The porterhouse from Argentina. Jean? You mailed in my company a postcard a few weeks back, requesting information on penny stocks that had huge upside potential with very little downside risk. Stratton Oakmont Commercial: Mark Hanna: Ok, you're going to want to raise those numbers. You want me to sell you this fucking pen? I have been a rich man and I have been a poor man. Good! I'm sure every person has this; it's just that my monologue is particularly loud. More importantly, you will learn. Who the fuck has the goddamn gall to call this house on a Tuesday night? Alden Kupferberg: Want me to come for you? Jordan Belfort: We want to hear what you have to say but need to verify your account. Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: And from now on, it's gonna be nothing but short, short skirts around the house. Give me one for the nerves! Shut the fuck up! Hi, how you doing? Why? By creating an account, you agree to the Does your girlfriend think youre fucking worthless loser? Jordan Belfort: [Furious about newspaper article] In 1987, Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio) takes an entry-level job at a Wall Street brokerage firm. Second key to success in this racket is this little baby right here. Tell me. Max Belfort: My Aunt Emma. Then came the Pink Sheet hookers, who were the lowest form of all, usually a streetwalker or the sort of low-class hooker who showed up in response to a desperate late-night phone call to a number in Screw magazine or the yellow pages. Theyre gonna need to send in the national guard or fucking swat team, cause I aint going nowhere! Jordan Belfort, I am not gonna die sober! Copyright Fandango. Okay, mommy likes to play games with daddy. And I will make you richer than the most powerful CEO in the United States of fucking America! The movie also features the "One of Us" chant, which is a reference to the 1930s horror movie Freaks. Donnie Azoff: Brooklyn. Jordan Belfort: After 15 years in storage, the lemmons had developed a delayed fuse. Jordan Belfort: Failure is your friend., Without action, the best intentions in the world are nothing more than that: intentions., I want you to back yourself into a corner. it should simply be a lesson learned about the world of the stock broker because it's not possible to empathise with his character as everything he does it so vile. With their beautiful wife by their side, who's got big voluptuous tits. Like, Run free! You know? Donnie Azoff, There was this one time I was selling pot to this Amish dude. All day long, decimal points, high frequencies. And who're you gonna be sitting next to? Pick up the phone and start dialing! That'd be 40,000 shares, John. Jesus Christ, I think you have a fuckin' drug problem. You're lookin' at me like I'm crazy. Brace yourself for an outrageous true story from legendary. Trust me, okay? Can fucking sell anything. Go ahead and fuck me. Jordan Belfort: Everybody on point! What, you wanna go inside and blow some lines of baking powder, baking soda? Alden Kupferberg, the Sea Otter, didn't even graduate. Im not like, gonna let someone else fuck my cousin, you know? That's why all this confusion. So you listen to me and you listen well. She designs women's panties too? What the fuck are you talking about? Jordan Belfort: And you know something else, daddy? That's right. You could pay off your mortgage. Oh my God! That'd scare the shit out of me, buddy. Jordan Belfort: Hey, everybody, listen up! Oh my God! Yes, I think it's true. Fuck you, U.S.A. Fuck you, U.S.A. Fuck you! I'm a former member of the middle class raised by two accountants in a tiny apartment in Bayside, Queens. You're dealing with numbers. In 1987, Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio) takes an entry-level job at a Wall Street brokerage firm. And today, you needed to clean your fishbowl, today? Right there? I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! Jordan Belfort, I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! Jordan Belfort, If anyone over here thinks Im superficial or materialistic, go get a job at McDonalds because thats where you belong. Jordan Belfort, But before you depart this room full of winners, I want you to take a good look at the person next to you. Privacy Policy Mark Hanna: You probably had to pay them in cash with your hands! the success of scorsese's wolf of wall street is that it's enjoyable to watch and it shouldnt be. Let me give you some legal advice: Shut the fuck up! 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Don't you Duchess me! . Jordan Belfort, Theyre gonna need a fucking wrecking ball to take me out of here. Thank you for your vote of confidence and welcome to the Investor's Center. So, I presume you're Italian. Look at yourself, Jordan. Jordan Belfort: Give me a kiss, sweetheart. Martin Scorsese's The Wolf of Wall Street is a darkly comic crime epic that tells the true story of stockbroker Jordan Belfort's rise to power and fall from grace. Asking specific questions to gather intelligence and to understand the customers needs. That's not why I do it. So It's Wolf of Wall Street, But for Learning How to Pick Up Girls Stevie Emerson 1.22M subscribers 1.6M views 2 years ago WATCH BLOOPERS FOR EVERY VIDEO. Turns out all the FBI really wants from me is to cooperate. Chester Ming: Then look no further. Sound good, John? Venice. Look, I know you're not following what I'm saying anyway, right? Don't you wanna be my friend? Jordan Belfort: Who's Venice? All Id done was taken the small liberty of moving things to their logical conclusion, changing T and E to T and A: Tits and Ass!, If I earn a million dollars a week and the average American earns a thousand dollars a week, then when I spend twenty thousand dollars on something its the equivalent of the average American spending twenty dollars on something, right?, But what I sincerely hope is that my life serves as a cautionary tale to the rich and poor alike; to anyone whos living with a spoon up their nose and a bunch of pills dissolving in their stomach sac; or to any person whos considering taking a God-given gift and misusing it; to anyone who decides to go to the dark side of the force and live a life of unbridled hedonism. I'm constantly asking myself questions. And all my friends are trying to fuck her, you know, and Im not gonna let one of these assholes fuck my cousin. I'm still hard. Did you cum? Naomi Lapaglia: Some of these girls, you should see them. The movie, starring Leonardo DiCaprio as Jordan Belfort was, in my opinion, a masterpiece by director Martin Scorsese. Feel free to reach out and connect. right? You're gonna knock whose fucking teeth in? [when asked who is Captain Ahab] I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! Like, "Run free!" Donnie Azoff: Honey oh my God!, you probably had to pay them in cash with your hands! And actually do some work besides swiping my fucking credit card all day, huh? Once in the morning, right after I work out. Exactly. Well, we don't work for you, man! So if you've got a client who bought stock at 8 and now it's at 16 and he's all fucking happy, he wants to cash in and liquidate, take his fucking money and run home, you don't let him do that 'cause that would make it real. We grew up together, and she grew up hot, you know. There are solid performances from all the main and supporting characters. Honey, you okay? Absolutely not but we were making more money then we knew what to do with. Jordan Belfort, There is no such thing as bad publicity. And you know what else? I don't have jack-shit. Yeah. Oh, hey. I mean, who the fuck wanted to live there? Good luck on that subway ride home to your miserable, ugly fucking wives. My fucking warriors, who will not hang up the phone until their client either buys *or fucking dies!*. You be telephone fucking terrorists! Donnie Azoff: I have been a rich man and I have been a poor man. Saurel! This is the greatest company in the world! California, baby! Good! Go on. Controlling the sale by keeping it on the straight line (every time the customer tries to take the . It wasn't even a choice. If I can be of any help to you on your journey I'll do my best. Once in the morning, right after I work out, then once right after lunch. Stay up-to-date on all the latest Rotten Tomatoes news! This is what happens when you fuck with your pets on new issue day! * And I had skipped the tingle phase and jumped straight to the drool phase. The book, motherfucker, the book! Good, pick up the phone and start dialing! Brad, show them how it's done. Across the Verrazano's Bridge. Actually, the madness started on our very first day, when one of our brokers, Ben Jenner, christened the elevator by getting a blow job from the sales assistant. What are all the little fuckheads doing while you're here? Best The Wolf of Wall Street Quotes. You gotta be a fucking pal You know what, I'm gonna give you a fucking pass, just give me the case. Donnie Azoff: Act as if you have unmatched experience and then people will follow your advice. Some disgusting wildebeest with three days of razor-stubble, in a sleeveless muumuu, crammed in next to you in a carload full of groceries from the fucking Price Club. You hear me? What? Jordan Belfort: They're called telephones. We'll get broad-sided and tip over. So I, you know, used the cousin thing as like like an in with her. I got five more just like you, bro. Jordan Belfort: Its a woozie. Your hair looks good. This movie unfortunately is too raunchy to ever be considered for an award, but it is a quality film. After all, the IRS knew about this sort of stuff, didnt they? In point of fact, The Wolf of Wall Street: WOLF OF WALL STREET:Wolf of wallstreet: Wolf of wall st {wolf of wall street}:by Jordan Belfort. Turn around! The real question is this: was all this legal? No one's gonna fucking die! And eviscerate your enemies. FBI! Jean Jacques Saurel: And by the way, John, our analysts indicate it could go a heck of a lot higher than that. However, while Belfort and his cronies partake in a hedonistic brew of sex, drugs and thrills, the SEC and the FBI close in on his empire of excess. Shit, I can sell lubes to a convent full of nuns, get 'em so horny they'll be fucking each other in the coffers. Act as if you have unmatched confidence and then people will surely have confidence in you. Naomi Lapaglia: He said even if you don't get convicted I've got a good chance of getting them. Still, give them to me young, hungry, and stupid, and in no time, I'll make 'em rich. Not a stitch. It took 90 minutes for these fuckers to kick in but once they did, *pow. Gotta pump those numbers up. Your hair looks good. Jordan Belfort: Bang, bang, bang. Im gonna let you in on a little secret about these telephones. It'll also help your fingers dial faster. Let's go the other fucking way! WHY? That's not how you treat people. Wouldn't you like to know how to sell it? But who the fuck wanted to live there? Jordan Belfort, Let me tell you something. Jordan Belfort: Patrick Denham: And with this script, which is your new harpoon, I'm gonna teach each and every one of you to be Captain fucking Ahab. See, for a brief fleeting moment, I'd forgotten I was rich and I lived in a place where everything was for sale. You show me a pay stub for $72,000, I quit my job right now and work for you. Jordan Belfort: Listen to me, if you piss up the SEC's leg, you end up with your tits in a wringer. So I was a little surprised you asked Christie for my number. Tell me something I don't know, I wait all week for the fucking Equalizer and they have to fucking [picks up the phone, then calmly, in a transatlantic accent]. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Brad: Get off me! She's already got C-cups, but now she wants FUCKIN' DOUBLE D'S! I want to. Her father is the brother of my mom. Jordan Belfort: But it's not like what you think or whatever, you know Jordan Belfort: Yeah, there's like a 60 percent, you know 60, 65 percent chance the kid's gonna be fuckin' retarded or whatever Jordan Belfort: Jordan Belfort: You're a lying piece of shit! [sigh of relief] What the fuck is going on out here? Jordan Belfort: I don't wanna die, Jordan! Great. Fugayzi, fugazi. Search, discover and share your favorite The Wolf Of Wall Street GIFs. Oh, Jesus Christ. Jordan Belfort: So you listen to me and you listen well. Even more fucked was that he got busted for shit that had nothing to with me. That is fucked up! I don't wanna die, Jordan! Can't imagine ever not enjoying getting fucked up. If anyones gonna fuck my cousin, its gonna be me. Captain Ted Beecham: Nothing. [Sees a young broker cleaning his fishbowl] It was a hefty sum, $5 million, and in truth it had little to do with setting them up. I'm not a scientist; I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Mark Hanna: How about that, faggot? The Quaalude, or lude, as it is commonly referred to, was first synthesized in 1951 by an Indian doctor - that's dots, not feathers - as a sedative, and was prescribed to stressed-out housewives with sleep disorders. You're gonna give me a pass? Jordan Belfort: Yeah, no. Jordan Belfort: I'll tell you what: I'm never eating at Benihana again. Jordan, this is how it's gonna go. You snooks will now be targeting the wealthiest 1% of Americans. Donnie Azoff: Together with his trusted lieutenant (Jonah Hill) and a merry band of brokers, Belfort makes a huge fortune by defrauding wealthy investors out of millions. It's fucked up. The Wolf of Wall Street Buff Revised Pages 3/5/13 62. . Who? Integrity. Like you married your cousin or some stupid shit, you know? ~ Teresa Petrillo. Donnie Azoff: Most of the quotes by Jordan Belfort are very inspiring and Ive even included some funny quotes from the movie. The Wolf of Wall Street is a memoir by a former stockbroker and trader Jordan Belfort, first published in September 2007. Good luck on that subway ride home to your miserable ugly fuckin' wives. Why why why god, why would you be so cruel as to choose a chain of fucking hibachi restaurants to take me down! The Wolf of Wall Street is one of the most iconic films of the 21st century Credit: Alamy. It's beautiful! Many weren't happy with the ending, though it was a very accurate representation of this day and time, and falls in line with typical Scorsese films. No, baby. Naomi Lapaglia: After all, what was there to say? Your AMC Ticket Confirmation# can be found in your order confirmation email. Stratton Broker in a Bowtie: The year I turned 26, as the head of my own brokerage firm, I made $49 million, which really pissed me off because it was three shy of a million a week. It's startin' to shit in the house again. You had to deal with the gold course people, too! there's some very awkward but funny, laugh out loud, moments that i'm still thinking about and laughing to myself over long after viewing. It's flooded! It's like playing a game of chess with your own life. What kind of person are you? It is no matter. From movie lovers to businessmen alike The Wolf of Wall Street is arguably one of the most iconic films of the 21st century.

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